Who Is Checking on Her?

[00:00:00] There was a deep conversation in the community the other day and I'd like to honor it here. There's something about motherhood that nobody can fully explain before they live it. You can be grieving and still hear, Mama, I need you.

[00:00:24] You could be sick, you could be really sick with all the symptoms, but you're not going to be in bed. You're not going to be found in bed watching movies, trying to feel better because someone still needs you. You could be in full on physical pain. You can have a broken heart. You could be overwhelmed, trying not to cry, choking back tears. But you can't because there are little eyes watching you all day long.

[00:00:54] You still need to prepare the meals. You still need to answer all the questions. You still need to prepare for the day or for bedtime. Someone needs help getting dressed, wiping a tushy, changing a diaper. It doesn't end. It doesn't end. There are moments when the, that we're talking about when a mother perhaps wants to fall apart, but can't.

[00:01:22] Not yet because the children are awake. So she swallows it. She wipes her face. She gets up and she keeps going. And you know, she's hurting. You know, she's hurting as a mother. If you're listening, you know, she's hurting, but somebody still needs her to be steady. The whole house needs her to be steady. And that takes strength, a kind of strength we rarely name.

[00:01:52] And sometimes women caring the most or the woman caring the most is the one everyone assumes is doing nothing. Because she's just staying home. Right? The stay at home mom. Oh, she's just a mom. I heard someone say something recently about a stay at home mother.

[00:02:18] They literally said, she doesn't really do anything. She doesn't do anything. And I thought, we say that still. Someone who manages to pay for a stay at home. A nanny is paid. A driver is paid. A teacher is paid. A housekeeper is paid. A personal assistant is paid. Someone who manages schedules is paid. Someone who shops for the household is paid. Someone who prepares food, especially from scratch is paid.

[00:02:47] And I know there's so many mommies in our community that don't use microwaves. They cook from scratch. Those kind of people are paid. Someone who stays awake with a sick child while they're sick is doing work. Someone who carries the emotional pulse of an entire home is doing work. But when one woman does it all, I'm surprised.

[00:03:16] But some people out there call it nothing. She's staying home. She's a stay at home mom. She doesn't do anything. And I think we need to have a more honest conversation because this isn't really about laundry or dinner or cold coffee or cold matchas. Those are just symptoms. The deep, the deeper way is this.

[00:03:46] She's often the person who's never fully off. And today I want to ask who's checking on her. So get comfortable. Grab the person you love. Grab a healthy snack. Get comfortable. We're about to have an incredibly beautiful conversation honoring. Honoring the women who need.

[00:04:18] Oh, that's better, right babe? She founded an architectural concrete company. He founded a hundred million dollar clothing company. She took the world by storm as a social media star. He took the world by storm as a famous serial entrepreneur. Together we started a business. And had babies. Now we're figuring out the best ways to do both. Join us as we learn from other entrepreneurs going through the same life struggles.

[00:04:47] As they share their life hacks about success, love, kids. And everything in between. Hello my friend and welcome back to Becoming Unshakeable, the Legacy Conversations bonus series brought to you by the Entrepreneur Parents Podcast. I'm your host, Ildiko Ferenzi. And today's conversation is for the woman everyone depends on. The wife, the mother.

[00:05:16] Some of you are homeschooling, the homeschool mom, the caregiver, the woman whose life may look really simple and easy on the outside, but who is caring more than most people realize. And it is also for the husbands and the village, the communities around her.

[00:05:41] Because sometimes the woman who appears strongest is only strong because she has never been given another option. There's also, there's a phrase people use now. I think you've heard it. It's the default parent. And if you are one, you know exactly what it means.

[00:06:05] You're the person everyone automatically comes to who knows all the doctor's names, the dentists, where you know where the shoes are, the different sizes of clothing. You know where everything is kept. Like even just the little, little teeny tiniest that you know exactly where it is. It's like you do inventory on the entire home.

[00:06:31] You know what time the practices are or the coaching meetings. My son and daughter have, they join coaching meetings with me. They're sitting in there. You know exactly what time it is. You know exactly who needs new clothes. This includes husbands. It includes you. It includes you. You know who's emotionally struggling. Because mom notices.

[00:07:00] Mom notices all these things. Who hasn't been sleeping well. Mom notices. Who needs, who needs a dentist appointment. Who needs a doctor's appointment. Mom always remembers. But the weight of being the default parent is not only the number of tasks. It is in the knowing.

[00:07:21] That even when you're not okay as a mother, you're still expected to know and do all these things. You could be grieving someone you love. And you still have to cook the meals from scratch. You could be recovering physically from surgery or whatever it is. An injury. And you still hear your name every two minutes.

[00:07:49] You could be scared, terrified, and still make everyone else around you feel safe. Many times you could be carrying something privately and still make childhood feel normal and beautiful for your children. That is an enormous emotional responsibility. And because mothers often do this so quietly and it seems so effortless.

[00:08:18] Right? It's effortlessly done. People can completely miss the strength that it requires. There's another part of this conversation that we rarely talk about honestly. Sometimes a woman, she'll step away from an incredibly successful career. Right? She's made it to the top, the top tier.

[00:08:47] She's made it to the top tier. A great income. A beautiful professional identity. Momentum that she spent years building. But she chooses it joyfully. Because she knows exactly why she's doing it. And the truth is, she would choose her children again and again a thousand times over.

[00:09:12] But choosing something beautiful doesn't mean nothing was sacrificed. I'm going to say it again. It doesn't mean nothing was sacrificed. It doesn't mean that she didn't walk away from that big paycheck, that big accomplishment that she worked so hard for. And many people have daughters in university. Right?

[00:09:43] And they're going to be in university and they may just touch base on something. Maybe a career. Just touch base on it. And then they give it up. Willingly. Right? To become a mother. To take care of her husband and the children. Maybe that's the way to look at it. Because you'll notice that as a father or mother. And I think sometimes women feel guilty even admitting that. It's this...

[00:10:13] It was interesting to hear women say that I feel so guilty because I was in such a good place. I was super successful. The money was coming in. And then I walked away. But I don't even want to talk about it. Because I don't want people to think that I'm not grateful for the life that I have now. Because I am so grateful. This is the biggest blessing of all. But they have a hard time saying that it was. It was a sacrifice.

[00:10:42] Because now there's no... I mean, well, most of the women, of course, they have their, I want to say allowance or whatever it's called. Right? If the husband's out working, she should be receiving some kind of financial... She should be able to obviously go get her hair done. Her hair done. Her hairs. Her hairs. Whatever hair she has left on her head. Her hair. Her nails. Or whatever it is.

[00:11:10] But some people are not. Some people don't. Some people don't. And then they feel this guilt because they had it all. And then they have this beautiful family. But they're struggling. They're struggling. And they can absolutely say, yes, I would choose my family again and again.

[00:11:34] But I think that there needs to be this permission to also say, there was parts of myself that I had to lay down. Because both can be true. Both can be true. You can love your family more than anything in the world. Because it's true. Especially people in this community. They love their children and their family.

[00:12:03] Maybe toxic many times more than themselves. More than themselves. But sometimes it's so healing to actually admit and just say, and be acknowledged for everything you had to lay down and the sacrifices that these mothers made. But here's what I've come to believe. That she may have stepped away from one identity.

[00:12:34] And I don't care what those people out there say. She doesn't do anything. She's just a mom. She doesn't bring any value. Maybe they don't see it. But she is not less valuable. Okay? She's just building something else. A home. A childhood. A family culture. A place of safety.

[00:13:01] And we know that place of safety because the kids always, not always, but I mean most of the time they gravitate towards the mother. Because she's built that culture, that environment, that safety. A thousand invisible moments her children may not understand until they are older. Oh my gosh, I understand everything my mom did now. I see it now.

[00:13:30] And perhaps one of the biggest mistakes we make is measuring unpaid work as though unpaid means worthless. It doesn't. Okay? I'm telling you right now, it doesn't. And if you haven't been given that validation, just know. Just remember. It is the biggest sacrifice. Okay? It is the biggest sacrifice.

[00:13:58] And in the eyes of God, it is so honored. Listen, I once heard a family law attorney make a point that it stayed with me. And we were talking about this the other day. When people dismiss a stay-at-home mother by saying she doesn't earn anything or she's not worth anything, she's not doing anything.

[00:14:26] Look at what it costs to repair, or not repair, to replace. Look at it this way. What does it cost to replace what she actually does? Child care. Put a price on that. Personal nanny. Sleepover nanny.

[00:14:47] I know there was this one time I got a nanny, a night nurse, for two nights. Two nights. It cost me $898 or something along. It was almost $900 for two nights. Because for some reason, a night nurse is more.

[00:15:17] I was in a lot of pain. And I needed help. I needed help. I needed help. And it almost cost $1,000 just for two nights. What do you mamas do out there? Okay? Transportation. Put a tag on that. Household management. That's just the management deciding what needs to be done. Meal preparation. What else did he say? Oh, cleaning.

[00:15:46] Right? Cleaning. Scheduling. It's more for bathrooms and stuff, by the way. Educational support. This is just support. Someone to lean into for educational support. Uh, because some, there's some mamas out there. There's some people, right? Hands up. Homeschooling. Emotional care. The list goes on. And if every one of those roles were outsourced, did I say cooking from scratch?

[00:16:16] I cook from scratch. Many of the women in our community, they wouldn't dare put a meal in the microwave for their husbands or for their kids. And remember this, gentlemen listening, the way that you cook for your husbands, it determines their life expectancy. Right? So just think of it. Are you going to pay someone to cook for you to throw things in a microwave and kill all the nutrients? Or are you going to pay them to cook from scratch?

[00:16:44] There's a different price tag on both of those chefs or, or people preparing the food. Listen, if every one of those roles were outsourced, nobody would call those women worthless. Or those things worthless. I hate using the word, word worthless. I hate that. But guess what would come? Guess what would come? The invoices.

[00:17:14] Yet somehow, when a wife or a mother performs all those roles inside her own home, and now she doesn't have the career, people can become acting as though she's contributing less. And that is not only inaccurate, it could be deeply damaging. Okay? Especially if the person saying it is someone close to her.

[00:17:44] Because the woman, or the women who gave up income to support the family's shared life should never be made to feel as though she became a dependent with no value. Yuck. Yuck. That's terrible. She became a partner contributing in different currency.

[00:18:09] And that can, contribution deserves respect and, and, and gratitude guys and women. Okay? Okay. Don't think that you, and a lot of people out there, they're running, they're running, not only are they doing all the things, but they're running some kind of business or they're trying to get something going too.

[00:18:38] Maybe it's with their husbands or on their own. Maybe they have, maybe they have a podcast. Maybe they have, whatever it is, but they're doing all the things. And somehow in the community, when they, when some of these women were sharing, they were sharing how, how worthless they felt. And it hurt to hear that. It hurt to hear that. And it hurt to hear that some of the people around them were saying that they had no value.

[00:19:07] Oh, it hurt. But even that still, it doesn't capture, it doesn't capture the whole thing, right? What the attorney said. And he, he rattled a ton of stuff off. And that, that, you know, as a pit bull, he goes after. And he's like, I'm not sure. Because it's shocking to him that it's not noticed until the split up happens.

[00:19:36] And then there's a big number on it, like compensation, going back and all the other things. But what does, what, what still doesn't capture the whole thing, um, is that because you can't always put a salary on it right away, there's also being the person, the primary person.

[00:20:01] Like I'm talking, I'm talking, I'm talking like really fall into the heart of this person, knowing that they're going to be the primary person when someone is sick or frightened at 2am in the morning.

[00:20:17] Knowing, knowing, having the ability to know which cry a child has that means pain or, or like physical pain or emotional pain. And, and, and which cry means fear, uh, holding a child while your own heart is breaking.

[00:20:43] There's, there's no, there's no compensation to that. You cannot put, uh, a pay, like a, uh, what is it? A dollar value to that, to put your own mask on because someone else's is going through it. So you put your heart break away. Creating stability during a season when you feel anything but stable.

[00:21:07] Many women just after the baby, or maybe some people I, I, I'm watching this, this mama right now. Oh gosh, she's dealing with a serious health. Um, it's just, it's hard to watch. She's going through the C word right now. And she's going through a lot of other things too.

[00:21:34] And these mamas, they put their grief on a shelf. They put the pain on the shelf. They put their illness on a shelf. They can't go be sick. They got little babies. They got little ones. Because someone else needs help. Someone else needs help. And that's the priority. Smiling at a birthday party or an event or whatever it is while privately carrying something nobody in the room knows. They wouldn't even have a clue. They wouldn't have an idea.

[00:22:13] Motherhood doesn't pause. Because even when we had our big careers and our big identities, if we didn't feel well, we could sleep for 12 hours if we wanted to. We could go do what we needed to do. We could go for a morning workout. We could go for coffee with the girls. Okay? This is the part that we miss. Motherhood doesn't pause.

[00:22:39] Just because the mother is going through something or hurting. My little one just walked in again. See? There's a juggle. You can't put a price on those things. That's why checking on her matters. The other day, I was actually having a moment, a low moment. Really, I was feeling down.

[00:23:07] I started grieving the person that I missed. And I didn't make some big announcement about it. I was going on about... I was feeling a lot of little things. Just like a lot of us moms out there. We're going through some things. But there was no big announcement. I wasn't asking anyone to fix anything. I wasn't crying about it or going to tell anyone.

[00:23:36] But my aunt, she sent me a message. Because we're... They're going on a cruise. And I'm trying to make it all work. I'm really hoping. I'm really hoping. And a lot of my family reach out. And it's hard. Because they live so far away. And I don't get to see them often. That makes me really sad. And so anyway.

[00:24:04] We're talking about this cruise. And some other things. And then she goes on about a couple things. And she just says, you know, you're an excellent mother. And then she goes into it a little more. And it reached me. More than she probably knew. Because sometimes the woman carrying everything doesn't need a speech.

[00:24:33] But when she notices that someone notices what she puts into her family. What she puts into the lives of others. And someone says, I see you. I know this is a lot. You're doing better than you think.

[00:24:58] Sometimes one sentence of, you know, you're an excellent mother because this, this, and that. It can meet a woman in a place nobody realized that she was standing in. And it made me wonder. How many women around us are silently waiting for someone to notice them too? Sometimes the very village around them don't notice. My children. I tell you this all the time.

[00:25:27] My children are really good at noticing too. They'll like notice I'm tired or dealing with something. Sometimes things are different since my surgery. It's hard. It's hard. And, um, and they'll notice something. And they'll come and say, do you want me to pray with you? Do you want to pray? Do you want to pray together? Or they'll say, you're an amazing mom, mommy. And it's my children.

[00:25:55] Again, they're the ones I pour into them. They pour into me. And I think the way as mothers that we pour into our children, it comes back and then it makes all the pain go away. It makes all the things go away. But when someone on the outside notices, it kind of catches you off guard. It caught me off guard, but it was the best thing. And I'd love, I'd love to speak gently to the husbands here that are listening with their

[00:26:25] wives. This is not, please, this is not about blaming men. Men carry weight too. And it's a different weight. And marriage should never become a competition about who's more exhausted. Okay, husbands. But husbands, um, look closely. Not only at what your wife accomplishes, but look at what she's carrying.

[00:26:56] If she's the primary parent, every hour, you're both home. You know she is, if she is. You know who they run to, even if you're sitting there. You know who they go to with whatever it is that they need. Do they go to you? Do they go to her? I mean, that's something to notice. But most of the time, they go to the mother.

[00:27:24] I know in our house, our children always do. Does she remain on while you recover from your day? Even when you're at home? Does she remain on while you're watching Netflix or whatever you're doing at the end of the day? Is she the one laying in bed trying to make them fall asleep, praying with them, doing the things? When you need space, usually our gentlemen do take it. They go out.

[00:27:53] They meet with their friends. They're right. They get to go work out. They get to do all the things. Does she, is she able to take space when she needs it? Does she get to take the space without organizing it for three hours before she leaves for two and then comes back to a four hour mess?

[00:28:21] That's, that's the one thing we're talking about in the community. That's hard because as mothers, you know, especially as primary, we have to arrange everything. It almost becomes a headache. It's like, I don't even want to leave because I got to plan everything out. I got to make sure everyone's fed. I got to make sure everybody's has all these things before they leave, before we leave.

[00:28:44] And then when we come back, there's this gigantic mess and now it really wasn't anything relaxing because, um, now we have to take care of this other stuff. And it's different because sometimes the different roles in the house, right? They get to just go meet someone for coffee or movie or dinner, or they get to go work quietly at a coffee shop.

[00:29:11] And, and there's nothing wrong with that, but just ask yourself, honestly, where does she get to disappear for a day without managing everyone before she leaves? Does she truly have recovery? Does she truly have recovery? Or is she coming home to, you know, do the, to take care of things that are now disheveled

[00:29:40] and little emotions? Mama, mama, mama, mama, this happened, this happened, this happened, this happened. Oh my gosh. So, I mean, that's the question rather than saying, yeah, yeah, they can go anytime, anytime they can go. Are you creating the conditions that create it possible for her to go? And for it to be okay, to actually recover.

[00:30:09] And sometimes love looks like, listen, I got the children, I got the meals, I got the whole day planned, everything planned. And when you come back, it's going to be spotless or even, even how about it's going to be better than when you left. You don't need to explain anything. Just go rest or just go rest, go rest. I know a lot of, one of the moms was saying, um, her husband told her to go lay down and

[00:30:38] all she could hear was she could hear something spilling in the kitchen, things being dropped, everything. Just, she, she just knew there was going to be a tornado when she came out after her migraine. And, and it's hard because it's hard for a lot of moms to let go without guilt because it's just, it's just a different life.

[00:31:06] Now I want to share that. I want to share something with you guys. There is a simple instruction in Galatians chapter six, verse two, carry each other's burdens. Isn't that beautiful? Carry, carry, not admire, like you're doing a great job. Thumbs up. You're doing great. That big smile.

[00:31:33] It's just carry, not notice from across the room, not say, wow, you're really strong. You're so strong. Carry. Sometimes loving someone means taking part of the weight. And especially in marriage. That matters. Your wife is not only the mother of your children. Most importantly, she's a daughter of God.

[00:32:01] She's a daughter of God. And I know some of the women in the community, they don't have big, mean dads that are always checking in. So you're, you're, you're, but listen, listen. She's a daughter of God. The best dad out there. She's a whole human being with a heart, a body, dreams, limits, grief, needs.

[00:32:32] And, and husbands, one of the greatest ways you can love her is to remind her that she, she should not have to break or some women out there that get sick, really, really sick before someone decides that, that their burden was heavy. So it's worth paying attention to that.

[00:33:02] It's worth carrying that burden together in your holy covenant. And to the women listening, I want to say something. I want to say something directly to you. Something the women in the community needed to hear the other day. You can love your children with your whole heart because we do. We would, we would, we would do anything for our children.

[00:33:32] We already know it from that first heartbeat. I'm snapping my fingers. The first heartbeat, right? The first heartbeat that we heard in that ultrasound, when it was confirmed that we were carrying, we were building a life inside of us. We knew we were going to be the mother lions. We were going to, we were anything, lay down a life, whatever it is. We would do anything for our children.

[00:34:01] I remember my mom saying it without a, without a blink of an eye, I would die for you. I will die for you. I will die for you. My dad, you know, men are protectors. But when a mom says it, there's this different weight. There's a different weight. And I did understand it when she said it till I became a mother.

[00:34:31] And you can, so listen, there's that powerful love that you have for your children, right? But it's still okay to feel tired. You could still feel tired. Give yourself the permission because this is the hardest architectural construction company doing auditions where you walk into a room. Everybody judges you. They rip you apart. They say no.

[00:35:02] Your dream job that you wanted, they say no. They slam the door in your face. There's many different careers that we've had. But I'm telling you straight up, this is the hardest one. The one that I've had to sacrifice the more for, most for. It's the hardest. But the most blessed, the most blessed. This is what I prayed for. And I'm so grateful that I have it.

[00:35:31] But sometimes I still feel tired. Is that wrong? No, it's not. You could be grateful for your life. You could be grateful for your life and still grieve the parts of yourself you had to lay down. You can grieve that stuff, especially mamas out there that just became mothers. Because everything changes. Everything changes.

[00:36:00] And it's okay to remember. Or maybe some of you grieve. You can believe motherhood is sacred. And beautiful and wonderful, which it is. And still need help. Before you reach for that coffee, consider this. What if the energy boost you're looking for isn't in your cup, but in your cells?

[00:36:28] I challenge you to swap your morning coffee for Shilajit by Symbiotica. And here's what can happen. No crash. No jitters. Just clean, sustained energy. Plus mental clarity and trace minerals that our bodies actually need. That are actually starving for, to be honest. This isn't just a supplement.

[00:36:54] It's an ancient adaptogen sourced from the Himalayas that supports mycochondrial function, stamina, and overall vitality. Your coffee never did that. Okay? Let's just be honest. Try it for a week and tell me your body doesn't thank you. Symbiotica's Shilajit is next level wellness. And honestly, you may never go back to drinking coffee. Click the link below down in the bio and get your Shilajit today.

[00:37:24] I think many of us feel guilty not wanting to ask for a little more help. And in the culture that a lot of people grew up in here in Canada or in America, the culture is a little different. Where I see a lot of women carrying the whole entire load by themselves. In Europe, it's still, you know, teammates.

[00:37:55] But still, here, it's a little bit different. And not all families. But it's okay to have the conversation of, let's start doing things together as teammates. And having those feelings, ladies, it doesn't cancel the other out. And please don't measure, oh, this is painful to hear.

[00:38:22] Don't measure your value by a paycheck. Paycheck. Some of you have been told that you're not really valuable because you don't have the paycheck anymore. Your work matters. That attorney was talking about how much it matters. And just remember the things that you're doing. Other people get paid for that.

[00:38:50] And it's split up. It's split up. You're a house cleaner. You're a private chef. You're a private shopper. But you're doing all of it. And all of those things have value to it. Don't forget that. But your worth also goes beyond the work. You're not valuable only because you serve everyone well. You're valuable. Listen.

[00:39:19] You're valuable because you belong to God. God. You're allowed to be cared for too. Okay. Grab your journals and something to write with. Now, just take a minute to ask yourselves.

[00:39:38] And if your husbands are here with you, you know, this is a great time for them to answer these questions with you. Who's carrying the greatest invisible weight in your home right now? Sometimes you don't even really realize until you think about it.

[00:40:06] If you're married, when was the last time I asked my spouse, what feels heaviest? Gentlemen. Does one of us have significantly more access to rest and recovery than the other?

[00:40:34] We talked about this in the community that some women were terrified to leave because when they got home, everything was just a disaster. Right? Right? The stove, the dishes, the fridge, the spills, the toys everywhere, the messes, the pee all over the floor, the pee all over the toilet, whatever it is.

[00:41:02] But when they started sharing, it was just like this release of they've never shared this stuff before. They never really shared why they don't go that often. And another question, am I assuming someone is fine simply because they keep functioning?

[00:41:27] You don't want to wait until one day they go to the doctor and they get a diagnosis and they say, well, she never rested. She was on 24-7. Even in the middle of the night, it was her. How did her immune system even have a chance to recover?

[00:41:49] And maybe the most important question, what can I completely take off their shoulders this week? Not with help or telling me what I need to do or how I need to do it. Just taking ownership of it. You hear, you see, there's a few viral videos right now about gentlemen taking full ownership of, you're never going to even have to think about this again.

[00:42:19] The vacuuming, the mopping, whatever. I mean, it could be anything. It could be anything. But just taking full ownership. Whatever. Whatever it is. Whatever. You could be creative. Just take full ownership. Don't ask how to do it. What needs to be done? Oh, but you never asked me. You got to tell me these things. Just, we're big boys. We're big girls. We're big girls, right?

[00:42:45] We stepped into a brand new world and figured it out. Okay, guys. You guys are so amazing. Because if you are here, if you're here listening, it's because you love each other. Because you care about each other. It's because you want to figure out how to make life for each other better.

[00:43:14] You want to be teammates. There's so many wonderful, even couples out there that you could surround yourselves with. We have such a beautiful community. Anyway, I'm just so proud of you guys for pouring into your marriages, for wanting to help each other. Let's come into prayer together. Two or more.

[00:43:43] That's our, that's, that's our, that's what we say. Two or more. Heavenly Father, thank you for every woman that's listening, quietly carrying responsibilities that few people fully see.

[00:44:01] Thank you for every mother who keeps showing up, even while they're hurting, even while grieving, even while fighting for their lives, even while exhausted, even when she doesn't feel strong. Lord, please strengthen the woman listening who feels worn thin. Remind her that you see the work nobody applauds.

[00:44:31] You see the tears she waits to cry. Or hasn't cried, hasn't cried yet. Lord, you see the tears she's been Lord, open the eyes of the people around her. Help them notice. Teach us to carry one another's burdens before someone collapses beneath them.

[00:44:58] Give women permission to receive care. Not only give it. And remind every person listening that strength does not mean carrying everything alone. In Jesus' name, amen. Amen. If this conversation encouraged you today, would you share it with someone who may need this exact conversation?

[00:45:25] So that they realize they're a little less alone that a lot of people are going through this. And it's just one little part. But we have to acknowledge it. And if becoming unshakable has become part of your week, make sure you follow the show. And if you have a moment to leave five stars and a kind review, it helps more families find these conversations.

[00:45:54] And it helps people pour into their marriage, into their families, and make beautiful changes to strengthen families. And if you have children in your life, come listen to Daniel and Destiny on the Entrepreneur Kids Legacy Show. Screen-free learning designed to plant seeds of faith, courage, leadership, character, and purpose.

[00:46:21] In the next generation. And if you'd like to help continue creating these shows that they're working so hard on to reach more families, you can leave a gift at buymeacoffee.com backslash entrepreneurkidslegacyshow. Every follow, every share, every review,

[00:46:49] every act of love for either my show or their show, it really helps us grow and reach families that need it. So thank you so much for being a part of this community and for building strong families, strong futures, and unshakable legacies together side by side.

[00:47:18] Listen, maybe the woman you love, maybe she looks strong, right? I remember looking at my mom growing up all my life. She was so strong. She was so strong. The children were, I mean, we were thriving. We were thriving. The house keeps moving, right? So the woman right beside you, everything's great.

[00:47:47] The children are striving. The house is moving. She's smiling. Please don't let her competence fool you into believing that she is weightless. Because every woman, every woman carries weight. And when I look back now, I was always very helpful with my mom, with my mother. I was always very helpful. But I look back and I wish now,

[00:48:16] I wish I could have helped her more. She was carrying this unbelievable weight that I never really realized. I mean, I knew she worked hard. But somehow she was like this superwoman. So let's not forget to ask, to look, to notice. And not only tell her, you're amazing with the thumbs up, like you're doing a great job. Make things lighter. Take something over.

[00:48:43] Give her some space to breathe. Because sometimes the greatest act of love is not praising someone for how much they can carry. You're so strong. You're carrying so much. That's so great. Keep going. It is quietly reaching over and taking some of the weight and saying,

[00:49:12] you don't have to prove how strong you are with me. I mean, there's those gangsters out there. Those gangster women that are tough and handling it all. And the truth is, tell me if I'm wrong. They just want to be babied. They just want to be babied. Not by the world, but by their husbands. They want to be babied. They want to be babied. They're babying everybody else

[00:49:40] and taking care of everything. They're running businesses, taking care of the house. They're doing all these things. And you don't have to be running a business because you're still a gangster at home, okay? You got the load. You're doing it all. But just say, you don't have to prove how strong you are with me. I got you. Check on the woman. Check on the women.

[00:50:12] Check on the woman. Everyone depends. I'm trying to put this in the best words. Check on the woman everyone depends on. Check on the woman everyone depends on. Because sometimes the strongest woman in the room is simply the one who hasn't had permission to fall apart yet. God bless you.

[00:50:41] Glory to God always. And I'm so grateful for the community and the conversation that we had the other day and all the women that opened up. It truly inspired this episode. And I love you guys. I really love you guys. Oh, you are so strong. You're so incredible. And you're so amazing. And I'm not just sitting here with my, my tick, tick, diamond teeth, giving you a thumbs up. I mean it. I mean it.

[00:51:11] And do not be shy to ask to, it's biblically written, for someone to carry the burden with you. Okay? Because I know, I know, especially when we first become moms, these women, they want to carry everything. Especially if they've accomplished big things in their life. And then all of a sudden, they don't even realize what is coming at them.

[00:51:40] Because it is the hardest thing. Most blessed. Because I'm telling you, with that breath of that baby, is the best life that you're ever going to live. But it doesn't mean that it's not a juggle. It doesn't mean that there's not, there's, that it's, that it's easy as pie. Let's just put it that way. So I love you. I love you guys. And thank you for opening up the other day. And women who felt this today,

[00:52:10] I love you. God bless you. And I can't wait to talk to you soon. Thank you beautiful friends for listening to this important message It's from Mama. There is someone you love and care about. Oh, and we'd love to personally invite you to listen to our podcast. It's for young future leaders ready to change the world and be a light in the dark.

[00:52:39] Listen together as a family. It's called the Osno Kid. You're doing a remarkable job. And remember,

[00:53:09] you are the hero of your story. Because every legacy begins with a hero. And that hero is you. This podcast is for inspirational and educational purposes only. And it is not intended to replace professional advice, legal advice, diagnosis, or treatment. The views expressed are based on personal experience and faith-based insight

[00:53:38] and are meant to encourage reflection and growth. Always seek the guidance of qualified professionals regarding any questions or concerns you may have about your health, relationships, or business.